Bad date?

Dating? What is that? Not really but it has been quite a while since I have been on a date. Well that was mostly because the only guy I want to be going on dates with is... out of town. Anyway, I recently met a young man that did catch my interest.
Well I decided instead of just obnoxiously wanting to text him and debating with myself, I would just be bold and ask him on a date. Strawberry days was this last week. What a perfect opportunity. A carnival. A parade. A rodeo.
Since I was already going to the rodeo I decided that it would be fun to turn it into a date.

Background: There was one other couple on this date... and then Chelsey. I have been in this situation before and it wasn't awkward at all so I didn't think of anything of it. Oh and my date had met Chelsey 4ish years ago.

So my date suggested that we go get food before the rodeo and I got to pick. I didn't want to pick somewhere I always go so I chose Rancheritos. I have had food from here before that was super good. But I couldn't remember what I had ordered so I just got a bean and cheese burrito. It was gross. That probably didn't affect anything though.

While eating we talked but it wasn't the best conversation. It seemed like we were both struggling for interest in the topic. First red flag.
We made our way to the rodeo and it improved until we found our seats. I didn't realize at first but after awhile I noticed that my date was more interested in talking and flirting with Chelsey than me. Flag number 2. Well actually more like Major Red Alert. Chelsey flirts with boys and is pretty much oblivious. I know she will be reading this at some point so just know that I don't care at all that she is sassy and flirty. We're all guilty of it.

Anyway I can pretty much sum up the rest of the date in that last paragraph. I tried to talk and to flirt. He did too. But only 10% of the time was it directed toward me.

The rodeo turned into a cookie dough eating dare. Chelsey took it on and then I helped her out. That was pretty much unforgettable.

Jess and her date left for home because of a long drive. I was sad when Jess left but shortly after my date left. As he was driving off the night became 200% better. My jerk of a date didn't matter anymore and it was now Chelsey, Carson and I. I began laughing and I didn't have to care who heard (I'm pretty sure my laugh bugged my date) We went up to the PG water stump (I would say tower but it's not) and just talked. And talked. And talked. I believe we got there between 12 and 1. We didn't get home until 5.

When I think about it now, that was probably the best therapy I have ever had. It was needed. If Chelsey and Carson had left right away I would have gone down to my room and thought about how rude I had just been treated. Having that time on the water tower helped me realize that it didn't matter.

Chelsey is beyond an incredible person. She's cute and easy to talk to. She is a loaded sassy pistol which just makes her personality that much greater. If a guy who is on a date with me isn't able to see me past my best friend, he's not worth my time. I think I might just bring Chelsey on all my dates just so that I can weed out the bad ones.
She won't approve but I think it's a great idea.

I deserve a man who can appreciate who I am and want to focus on me no matter who is walking by.

I think I might be broken

I am so confused.

To understand my confusion you need to hear a story.

Once upon a time... almost three years ago... I met a young man. We'll call him John. I know you have all heard songs that talk about being smitten from the first conversation you have with someone. Well I don't know how many of you have experienced this but I definitely have.
From the very start this guy made me all blubbery. I felt sheepish and at a loss of words. I got excited inside every time I saw him. Any time there was a chance I would see him. Anyway. We spent time together. Had some fantastic times on my front porch where we just talked for hours.

After a while we started seeing less of each other. Almost to the point where I thought I had moved on. I became involved with a different guy and John started getting ready to serve a mission. A couple months before  John left I saw him again and all the feelings I thought were gone came rushing back. I decided that John would always be that one guy that would have a part of me. That was the last time I saw him before he left.

A little while after John had left, I was talking with a mutual acquaintance. She said that she had written him and suggested I should too. I seriously considered it. Where was the harm? So I did. The first time I opened my mail box to find John's reply, I just about died. I gave Chelsey and Kelsey a call and we freaked out about it for a while. This is how almost every letter opening proceeded for the next year.
After a while though it was just like I was writing my older brother. When I would see John's letters in the mail I would get a pleasant smile, and sometimes I would get real excited just because it was a great pick-me-up in the middle of a stressful week, but I didn't make any phone calls or get butterflies.

Then two months ago reality hit; John's two years were just about up. I didn't know what to expect. What was going to happen when he got home? I hadn't felt anything for him in over a year. I currently had my eye on another guy, Pete, and I really wanted to see if that would go somewhere. I was scared once John got home I would forget all about Pete and I didn't want to.

When John did get home he called me up and asked me on a date. To be honest, when he came to pick me up I was in my bedroom convincing myself that everything would be fine. And it was. We went on our date. It was lots of fun. Not too awkward. I definitely wasn't head over heels for John the way I had been before his mission. I actually didn't feel any spark of interest.

My liking of Pete continued and grew. He and I went on a couple dates. As I started looking back at how past crushes played out, I decided that maybe I was coming on too strong. This whole time I was considering John. Interest was growing. I decided that I would just go with whatever happened

This brings us to about a week ago. The semester was coming to a close and I was moving home. Pete went out of state for a summer job. I now live at home and three blocks away from John. This last weekend opportunities presented themselves and I am going with it. But I am scared I'm not ready.

Social life

You know that moment when you find out you get to spend time with that someone you are interested in?

I don't know about you but I just about explode with excitement.

I have been containing that excitement inside me for a few days now.

Then today happened. 

I looked at my calendar and realized that it's going to have to be postponed.

Reality Check.

Trina, you a are a busy college student. 

Having a social life is not allowed.

Sometimes I really hate being busy.

What are we to do when faced with decisions?

In my experience I'm not very good at doing this on my own. I like second opinions. Sometimes I will ask just about anybody, just as long as they are an acquaintance of mine. 

One thing I do know is that I make the best decisions when I ask for advice from Heavenly Father.

Well a few days back I was faced with, what I thought, a decision that had to be made right away. It concerns men. Like always. (If you can't tell, I was the little girl on the who loved just about any boy I saw running around the playground. If you get tired of my constant rants, I apologize.) Well as I was freaking about knowing what to do, I was told by a few different friends and reassured by the Lord that I don't need to worry about it right now. I didn't want to have to choose... but right now I don't have to.

The answer was simple. Usually is... If you ever think you have a huge predicament and need help with it, ask our Father in Heaven. His answers are always the right way to do things.

Lately

I've been trying to spend less time sitting in front of my computer wasting time. Result? I don't blog for a week and a half.

Well pretty much this last week I have been tired. I've been in such a bouncy mood. But still tired. 

Yesterday I almost fell asleep while getting my planters warts worked on.

I turned my alarm clock off and slept until 3:53. A.M. Just a reminder, I have to be to work at 4. Ya, problem. I was only about thirty minutes late. 

Then at about 2:00 today I decided it was time for a nap. I konked on one of the Richard's building benches and I woke up to find I had drooled on my backpack... Yummy. 

On a more lady-like note, I've started putting make-up on again. Mainly because I want to quit looking like a sweaty, disgusting mess when I get to a certain dance class, where, I get to dance and flirt with a certain cute boy.

On the dating spectrum, I have two friends who are setting me up on blind dates. That should be lots of fun. I am going to have to try not to say anything stupid or awkward... Unfortunately I'm really good at it.

I also got a letter in the mail from Natalie:} I was really super excited! She loves me.

And that is pretty much it. Have a wonderful week.

It's already been an interesting week...

I'm behind on my homework reading.
I have been having minor stressed to relaxed mood swings.
I've started showering in the evenings.
I finished my paper two days before it was due and had time to take it into the Writing Center to ask for
       pointers.
I made a mass batch of waffles last week and I've had waffles with every meal since.
Earlier today I put a pot water on the stove to boil. After ten minutes and having unboiled water, I went to
       check to see if the stove was really on and realized that I had turned on the wrong burner.
For lunch I had some of my roommates leftover pasta salad and then when I got home, she had thrown it away
       because it had been in the fridge for a while.
I took a nap this morning. First one this semester!

I'm excited to see how the next four days go.



I am going on a date this Saturday to the basketball game:} I am just kind of excited.

3 Weeks

Life has happened.

Highlights.
*I witnessed a bird commit suicide. The next day I learned my teacher gave him a funeral.
*I've prioritized and stopped doing half my reading assignments. Something has to be sacrificed if I want to stay sane.
*I'm now employed.
*I've learned of a halfway nocturnal species of human walking BYU campus. AM custodial.
*I've started daydreaming about and hoping to be able to move closer to campus.
*I've learned that I'm leading a certain boy on and I don't have to say yes to a date again. Don't know exactly how that will go.
*We made 27 pies for Thanksgiving.
*My nieces and nephews came to visit. Oh along with my brother and sister-in-law.
*Natalie went through the temple for the first time.
*There is now a 12 foot Christmas tree standing in my parents house with a little help of a ladder and a tall sister-in-law.
*I realized that I'm so stupid when it comes to liking boys. I'm always falling for the ones who have at least 20 girls who have already called dibs.
*After a perfect date, I've gone on such an exciting emotional roller coaster, that now I don't care if I die a spinster.
*Black Friday has made a major dent in my pocket. I've bettered my wardrobe a bit.
*This semester is almost over.
*I went on a blind date and didn't die.
*The W-4 tax form has confused me.
*A letter came in the mail stamped with the same stamps that I buy. PIXAR. Love.

Hope your past couple of weeks have been grand.

"Life is in session." -The Switch

Hehehe

Just Daydreaming...

Maybe I'm crazy but I'm smitten.

A Birthday.

Not everyone appreciates the reminder that one more year has passed, but I'm okay with it. For now. 

There is just so much to look forward to on Birthdays, I don't see why I wouldn't love them. I get calls from my siblings and we just talk about life. I get to pick what we get to eat for dinner and not have to prepare it. I get the feeling of being extra special.  It's one year closer to the rest of my life. I love the excitement of not knowing what is going to happen in the next year.

I can't say the the thought of getting older doesn't scare me. It does. I have a body right now and I love the  blessing it is. But how long am I going to be able to dance, run, hike or just go from day to day with the ease that I do now? What about my mind? I am a forgetful person as it is, what is going to happen when I get older?

It might be scary but it's alright because I will make the most of it. I heard that as we get older our bad traits become worse, so I am going to try my best right now to be the person I want to be when I am old. My memory might get lots worse but it's okay because I WILL remember that I'm alive and I have a body. So long as I can keep that thought alive in my mind, life is wonderful.


Every year my birthday has been different. One year when I was little my parents told me that I wasn't going to have a party that year and of course I believed them. Even when my sister asked me who I would invite if I were to have a party. I did get a party that year. For my sixteenth birthday I thought a surprise party would be the best. How I celebrated was the best but definitely not what I had in mind. Chelsey picked me up then we bought dinner at Wendy's and a Kong Kone at Macey's. For my eighteenth birthday, I would have never guessed that I would be running around Disneyland with my best friends.

I enjoyed this year's as much as any other. I slept in and then had some fantastic pancakes. I chuckled as I opened the gift Grandma gave me. You know your grandma loves you when she gives you a flashlight. I will make sure that I use it a lot in the future. After that Nat and I went to Costco for my ward calling. It was just the time they had all the free samples out... We headed home to put away our groceries but Eugene ran out of gas. That was an adventure. Natalie then took me to campus for a self defense class and we kinda just wandered around campus. We didn't take any stairs and rode all the elevators sitting down. So much fun.

What would a birthday be without a dance performance? While we were on campus, we decided to stop and watch the daCi day of dance performance. I love watching children dance. I then had the rest of the afternoon to study and get ready for my dinner date.

I was actually surprised when my friend said he wanted to take me out for dinner. I've never had a guy take me out for my birthday before but who would deny dinner with a friend. And I got to pick where we went. I chose mexican.

I think my talent for putting myself in embarrassing situations is really incredible. I hadn't eaten too much during the day because I was so looking forward to dinner. By the time we made it to the restaurant I was shaking. I don't know why it happens or what exactly triggers it but I would say it's kinda like hypoglycemia. I think he might have thought I was super nervous. While eating I spilled food on the table and I dropped my fork on the floor. Thankfully I didn't get any on myself. I also said some things that I didn't realize could be awkward till after I said them, but he was such a gentleman he just shrugged it off. It was a dinner full of opportunity to be embarrassed but I never felt embarrassed. This was momentous.

Anyway Kirk said that he was going to tell them to sing to me for my birthday and I threatened him not to. I thought I had won when he never said anything to our waiter. Just as I was finishing my smothered burrito, a group of waiters came in making lots of noise carrying the treat I would get if I endured this well. At that second I remembered Kirk had called that morning. They sang. Clapped. Kirk smiled, proud of his discreteness. And I turned red. But the fried ice cream was totally worth it.


When I got home, Natalie demanded I watch the movie she had just finished. It was a chick flick. The accidental husband. Really tender. Watch it.

As I lied in bed, I thought about what I had done for my birthday and decided that it was a wonderful day.

Ooh date.

Remember how I was saying I wanted to go on a date?

Last week I prayed that just maybe I would get asked on one.

Last night I went on a date. 

God cares about the things we think are silly to pray for. But he cares.

Anyway. 

Date.

In my life I have only been to corn mazes like a grand total of 2 times. The last one I can remember was for family night and the whole fam was kind of upset at each other so it wasn't very fun. 

Well Monday after class, my friend? (my mom said I use that word too much. She might consider him an acquaintance but we're friends.) asked me how I felt about corn mazes... I didn't really want to tell him my last experience for fear sounding like a complainer, so I just that I had only been a couple times. He asked if I wanted to go. Of course!

Anyway when I told my grandma, she asked why I was going on a date on a weeknight... Because I can.

Last night came around and I couldn't decide what to wear and I didn't want to over dress. I was trying for advice from Chelsey but I was pretty much not taking her advice... Then her boy gave some fantastic advice that I HAVE to share.

"Just wear clothes. 

Some prefer swim suits, some shower curtains, 

but I'd suggest clothes."

I've met him twice but oh I love him. So funny.

Well I just decided that I can look really great in a t-shirt and skinny jeans. 

I think I did very well.

He picked me up and we headed to the maze. We were with two other couples and we all raced through the maze... My date and I won. And we came out the right exit. So many people decide there is no other way out except the other exit... False. 

A couple minutes after we were out we met up with one other couple. Waited for couple 3 and then decided to go to the other activities while we waited. We went on almost everything... Whether we paid for it or not...

There wasn't anybody checking our wristbands at the haunted places where you pay more to go through. So why not. 

At the beginning of the night I had made a goal not to scream.

I failed.

I screamed once when a machine blew a really loud burst of air into my ear... Kinda super loud:\

We got our pictures next to a bunch of the different things to play on. They were pretty good pictures but I don't think I'll ever be seeing them again because he took them on his phone. Oh well.

We also raced through a blow-up race course...

I'm not very good at navigating those without falling over.

I lost.

After a while, couple 3 made it out of the maze. We were originally going to buy some hot chocolate but decided we could just go to one fella's house and have homemade malt shakes. So GOOD!

Where I'm from, at the end of a first date you give your date a hug.

Well I wasn't sure what to expect because this guy is an RM.

And I thought that maybe the hug thing was only a high school thing.

Thankfully there wasn't anything too awkward about the goodnight.

Except.

I have always felt bad for the tall guys that I have been on dates with.

I am a very short person.

So it kinda makes for a squatting hug...

Besides being scared to say something super dumb
it was a fun date.